Rules for Fair Fighting: Couples Therapy

This is used in couples therapy to help my clients have productive conversations.  If you can follow these rules, you are much more likely to have productive discussions. 1. Decide upon a time of day and time limit before you begin and stick to it. Make this session last around 20 minutes-don't overdo it. If you don't finish in that allotted time, schedule another time the next day. 2. Decide how many “zaps” you'll permit before you (or the other) walk out. A zap is a hurtful remark, an insult, a threat, a sarcastic dig and so on. Any attempt…
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Sex sells: a fact that continues to entrance and entangle people worldwide

/ Guest Post / By Zakk Mabrey Sex sells: a fact that continues to entrance and entangle people worldwide. The commercialization of sex is now a worldwide phenomenon and is becoming common place. Nearly everywhere you look, sexual signals are being placed into the minds of people of all ages. “Sex drive is something we all have to deal with,” Lara West, a professional sex therapist, said. “And because it is a basic drive, we have a hard time overriding it.” Companies and businesses use all forms of media to advertise their brands, from television and commercials to computer advertising.…
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The End of Identity

I. I can't not think and see, through OCD my kitchen table with thoughts of fire bursts into flames. Those images, they, keep coming every minute making a friend's movements into a musical. I am not alone by myself the world my unwanted guest my mind, myself. Thoughts played never willed make me wish I could make the world die, to live. I hate to think the world doesn't love me, but fate flows indiscriminately necessarily. I scream unheard in my own head and desire strength to lose my mind. They play I fight and won't go away growing stronger…
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Do You Have PTSD?

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, (PTSD) is often thought of for people who have been involved in war. However, there are many people who have PTSD from various traumas that can happen throughout one’s life, such as car wrecks, domestic violence, a near fatal illness, being abused, or witnessing a horrific event—even a natural disaster. It is important to understand that PTSD is a type of anxiety disorder. The symptoms of PTSD may include flashbacks (reliving the trauma), nightmares about the traumatic event, symptoms of avoidance and emotional numbing. This may include trying to avoid thinking or talking about the traumatic…
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Creating a Peaceful Holiday for your Family

Aren’t holidays great?  There are presents, food, time off work (for those fortunate enough), and time with family.  However, the time with family can quickly turn into disagreements, which then lead to out right fighting. Its all too often the times we all think should be enjoyed turn into episodes of family drama. Before getting together with family this holiday season, think about the triggers that cause these family problems.  Maybe Uncle Bobby is the one who starts problems by drinking too much.  Possibly it is Aunt Mildred who starts on a rant because Uncle Bobby is drinking too much,…
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What Women Drivers Should Know About Verbal Encounters

/ Guest Post / We have been asked on a number of occasions what is the best way to handle verbal encounters with male drivers and warehouse staff.  Here are few suggestions from our Women’s Personal Safety and Defense classes. Rule #1…   If you cannot control yourself … you cannot control situation. Lets face it, people say stupid things. Don’t react to casual comments.  The purpose of the comment was to get a reaction from you. Let casual comments slide and focus on responding vs. reacting. Don’t allow yourself to be baited into a verbal exchange with a potential heckler.…
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Shall I Begin Psychiatry or Counseling?

While often misidentified as the same, psychiatry and counseling are actually quite different. To begin, let me try and differentiate psychiatry from counseling. Counseling is traditionally focused on the practice of "talk therapy," or “psychotherapy.” That is, the process of working through problem/life issues by talking them through with a professional counselor. Such a professional will help clients to process their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, and will help clients to build strategies for improving their moods, lives and relationships. Psychiatry (with some exceptions) is generally focused on helping individuals to overcome specific problem issues with medication. Medication in Psychiatry Treatment…
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Living Within Your Means

Keeping up with the Joneses, go big or go home, and livin’ large are all mantras of our society.  These mantras may very well sound appealing.  However, they seem to cause a great deal of pain for many. In my office, I see people who are spending much more money than they are earning.  After the credit cards are maxed and the second or third mortgage has been taken out, people often find there is no place to turn and they are quite unhappy. What you own is now owning you, as the old saying goes.  It is unfortunate how…
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Coping with Trauma

People who have been attacked, assaulted, or have had their life threatened may have great difficulty coping with the stressors of life. This can show up in many forms, such as relationship problems, frequent nightmares, high levels of stress and anxiety, as well as persistent irrational fears and panic attacks. Participating in workshops to learn how to keep yourself safe is a fantastic way to empower yourself to make it much less likely that you will become a victim. These workshops often have a healing component to them. However, it is important to look at your own psychological healing and…
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Summertime and Mental Health

Sunlight affects a person’s mental health.  With the lack of sunlight, usually starting in November, people often begin to feel more depressed.  The summertime usually has the opposite effect and allows for much more happiness and energy. During the feelings of a carefree summer, are you taking care of your mental health?  Yes, it is much easier to focus on the positives.  However, it is also much more likely to slip out of your routine and go back to old habits.  What is it that keeps you on track?  What are the signs of slipping into a depression. Remember, there…
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